So here is my page portraying this. So real in my life but still all to be faced. We have a major decision looming in our house. Every month, every week, every
hour every minute brings us closer to making this life saving, honest and loving
decision. I am sitting here crying as I type because this decision could be be
very decisive in our house. It impacts on the life of one of my children. I have
never put these thoughts on paper before let alone published them anywhere but
here we go. My disabled son is in renal failure. He While he is still a few
years off being able to have his name on the transplant list. Deep down the
decision about donation is there in my subconscious. The reason that this
decision is so challenging for me is that I am unwilling to put my husbands, my
childrens or my own kidneys under investigation to see if we are compatable.
Please dont judge me for this thought. Really it breaks my heart to come to this
conclusion at this stage. I don’t like the what if’s. You know .... what if
something goes wrong with a donors life, or one of my children. Even how could
we survive with my husband out of work and what if my husband does not recover
his medical enabling him to continue to work. I know he would not be happy being
a stay at home dad. I mentioned life before. Here it is important to realised
that my special son was not boorn disabled it happened to him. Since that
defining moment (the one when he became disabled) I have come to question what
his quality of life is like in comparison with what might have been if..... The
there is the sheer fact that this little life places immense stress on all of
us. It has cnanged his ability to live independently as an adult, it has taken
away our ability o be spontanious in life and certainly changed our the way our
family unit interacts. A cant see wheat the pathway forward is going to look
like. I don’t know if my sons life will even put him in a position to be a
candidate for transplant. Maybe I am worrying about it all for nothing.
(The credits for this page can be found at Nuts4Digi here)